Don't get me wrong, these dogs are adorable. They can be a real pain in the ass, they've basically destroyed our kitchen with their constant chewing, and they don't always understand that naps require quiet, but they're really cute when they want to be, and it's easy to waste hours playing with them. But my father has taken it to the next level.
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| Leroy and Stitch in the sweaters I bought them. It is my firm belief that they love being dressed up. |
He LOVES these dogs. He plays with them, curls them up in his arms and whispers to them, gives them treats like its nobody's business, and gets offended if you yell at them. If you don't know my dad, this might seem only strikingly strange, but if you know him, then you'd understand that I'm living in a parallel universe. My dad doesn't usually like, well, anything.
Let's take our last pet, for example. We got Brutus when I was five years old, and my dad hated this dog. Brutus had spent the first year and a half of his life locked in a single crate with both of his parents, so he was pretty quiet and loved attention, but he was never really playful. Still, my dad didn't like him. Now, this could have been because of the way he was introduced to the family. My dad was away on business when he got a phone call:
Mom: Hi, Honey. Are you with people right now?
Dad: Yeah, we're about to sit down to dinner. What's up?
Mom: Oh, good! Then you won't be able to yell at me when I tell you I bought a dog today!
Dad: ...
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| Brutus and I in our early years. Nope, I'm not sure which of us is cuter. |
Dad and Brutus got off to a "ruff" start, to say the least, and it basically went downhill from there. But he has turned over quite the new leaf with Leroy and Stitch. After years of having a dog in the house that he hated, he insisted, the weekend after Brutus past, that we get not only one, but two dogs. And then we started buying things for them.
Now, I've dreamed of having a dog I could dress up for as long as I can remember, probably stemming from my middle school obsession with Paris Hilton and The Simple Life. Naturally, I bought them matching sweaters. But I come home for break to find that their bin is overflowing with toys. They have 4 beds throughout the house ... each! And here's the real kicker: my dad bought them matching houses for Christmas. Now these are not outdoor houses like Snoopy has in the Charlie Brown specials. These are two fabric doghouses that he has set up nicely in the middle of the living room.
He cuddles with them every night.
I remember being huffed at when I would ask for Cheerios in the morning.
Leroy and Stitch are the favorite children. I might as well just go back to school.
